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Was I a Holocaust Victim?

When I was about five years old, my family lived in a very small house which unfortunately had more than a few bugs crawling around in it. Sometimes my parents would spray the house with insecticide, but when they did I would become extremely frightened. I would run around screaming that they were trying to kill me. Eventually, they would wait until after I had gone to bed and then would spray at night.

I believe that this fear was caused by the recall of a concentration camp in which I was gassed to death in a past life.

Later, in high school, I had a fascination with anything that had to do with Germany. I would even buy German language courses since German was not offered at my high school. Then, when I was in my 30's, I had a vivid dream which helped explain many things - my fear of being gassed to death, my fear of insecticides, and my fascination with Germany.

In this dream, I am a young man about 34 years old and I reside in an old apartment building somewhere in Germany. The apartment has several flights of wooden stairs and I live at the top in a small apartment with bare floors. There is no elevator. I have a little daughter who is about seven years old.

In the dream there is only one scene. My daughter and I are wearing coats and she has a very large black tam on her head which is tilted to one side. I see her white socks folded down and her brown tie shoes. There are soldiers on the way up the stairs and I know they are going to take us away. I pick her up and hold her in my arms and I am feeling a very intense love and caring emotion from the very depths of my being that I cannot describe. In fact, I have only felt that powerful emotion in that one dream.

I am not gassed in the dream but somehow I know that that was the outcome of our having been taken by the soldiers. At the end of the dream a voice came to me and said, "Just to let you know that this is true, remember the word, 'Hadassah'." The word Hadassah was spelled out in my dream so that I would not forget it.

Interestingly, my current boyfriend happens to be of Swiss-German descent, speaks German, and says that he is certain that we have been together in a past life. In fact, we are both certain of that. I now realize that something could happen to me in one life and continue to affect me in another.

Posted Oct. 21, 2007